TWO???

 TWO?!?! 

For those who are in full swing into the adoption world adopting 2 boys at the same time is not a hard concept to comprehend.  But for those who are fairly new into this amazing world of adoption it can be a bit mind boggling to say the least!

Although Jon and I are not new to the “idea” of adoption, we are new to the actual “act” of adoption.  We have grown leaps and bounds in the education of the adoption process and all the terms that go along with it… especially for an international adoption and a “Hague Convention Country” adoption. And if you are reading this and have no idea what the “Hague Convention” is, Google it!

One thing you have to do in the adoption process is answer a bazillion questions!! During the home study process you have to write an autobiography.  Below are a few snippets from both of our autobiographies.  The reason I am sharing this is because we get asked, “have you really thought about this?”, quite often.  And it is totally fine that people ask, but I do not think people realize how much goes into completing a home study, Hague training (12+ hours), dossier, and then some.  There is a lot of “thinking” that goes into adoption and more importantly prayer.  Jon and I have been in prayer about adoption for over 6 years.  That has not been public prayer but personal and family prayer, as it should, as we have asked the Lord to guide us and direct us clearly in the direction we should go regarding adoption.

These portions on our autobiography are answering questions on our thoughts and personal experience with adoption and parents who place their children over for adoption: (Disclaimer, these are our personal thoughts and convictions on these topics.)

–Jon’s Autobiography:

“As I previously explained, I adopted my oldest son Aaron from my wife’s previous marriage.  I love Aaron as my own son, because he is my own son.  I have two biological kids and it is crazy how I do not look at any of them any different.  I am certain that there are reasons biological parents give up their kids for adoption.  It is difficult for me to think about the parent’s situation first.  I love children, and know that it is imperative for a child to have a mom and dad who loves them so very much.  If we can make a little more room in our family, and we can, for another child, we will love this child just as our other children.  The love of Christ is just that good.  As Jason, our youngest, said the other day when he was asked about what he thought about adoption, he said, “I don’t just like helping people, I like keeping them.”  God didn’t just like helping me, he kept me, and continues to keep me.  That is truly amazing. “

 -Bethany’s Autobiography:

“My personal experience with adoption has been seeing my husband adopt Aaron, my son, as his very own.  He has loved him and cherished him as if he were his dad since the day he was born.  I had never witnessed that kind of love before and it has been amazing to me!!  What an example of what God our father did for us! I know for us we first thought about adopting a child after our daughter was born in 2004.  We lost three babies due to miscarriages at 12 weeks.  Our desire was to have more children.  We had heard about New Horizons for Children through, Stephanie Shanks, who is our neighbor.  We looked into hosting but just did not feel that is was the right time in our life for that.  We also had gotten lots of info about local adoptions and info on Bethany Christian services.  We waited to go further in any process until we were for sure it was God’s timing and not ours!  I am so glad we waited for His timing.  I did become pregnant again and we had our sweet miracle boy JJ!!  We still had adoption on our hearts and knew it was still the thing for us to do but waited.  This past year November 2012 we began looking into New Horizons for Children…. Our heart was for “the least of these”.   It was then Stephanie came over and told us about this new Asian program.  We were trilled and began praying right away!!  God has guided us on this journey and we are so excited to where it has led! Praises beyond words!!!  My thoughts on parents who give up their children are not judgmental, you never know what people are going through.  It has been in my experience with a father (my ex) who gave up his parental rights, that not everyone is capable of parenting for one reason or the other.  It is though, our responsibility as believers to do what Deuteronomy 27:19 and James 1:27 says.”

Now, you know a little about what is on our hearts, we knew that adopting Gary was only the start of what the Lord was working on in our lives.  It was not clear as to the timing on when we would adopt again, but we knew we would. 

Psalm 37:4-7 ⁴ Take delight in the Lord,
and he will give you the desires of your heart.

⁵ Commit your way to the Lord;
trust in him and he will do this:
⁶ He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn,
your vindication like the noonday sun.

⁷ Be still before the Lord
and wait patiently for him;
do not fret when people succeed in their ways,
when they carry out their wicked schemes.

Will God really give you the desires of your heart??  It all depends of what the “desires of your heart” are?  We read in verse 5 that it says we must “commit our ways to the Lord; trust in Him and he will do this.”  Our ways must become His ways, our thoughts His thoughts, our heart’s desires His heart’s desires… How must we do this “transforming of our minds?” By getting to know our Father… through studying His word, you learn His ways, you learn His character, and you learn His desires.  By praying, you learn to hear His voice; even in a whisper… it becomes louder than your screams!  By submitting your life to Christ it is no longer you, but Christ in you… therefore His thoughts become your thoughts and His desires your desires.  Read Romans 8, Luke 9:23, Philippians 1:21, and Psalm 119:11

So now back to the topic of adopting TWO!   Over the last two months there were several things starting to happen that we became witness to.  We were also made aware that Willy was no longer being adopted.  Willy is one of two best friends that Gary has in the orphanage.  Willy is several months older than Gary and ages out this November!  Our hearts were torn and we began praying for God to lead a family to Willy.  We were able to meet Willy when all the kids landed at the Atlanta airport February 2, 2013…  Crazy as that first meeting was, Willy was the first boy I hugged and greeted in Atlanta! 

As we prayed for a family for Willy, the Lord was working on our family’s heart.  The reason I say family is because adopting for us is family decision.  Not just a Dad and Mom decision, but Kids too! I really don’t know why, other than the Lord placing us there, that we were involved in a “loop” of conversation that involved Willy and his “adoption process” status.  Seriously, the more I try to figure out “why” we were involved in this I just can’t figure it out… This was totally and only could be orchestrated by the Hand of our Father, who looks after even the least of these!

Jon and I were asked to consider adopting Willy because we were “paper ready”…  We prayed and prayed, and prayed! We prayed for doors to be shut in our face as we decided to go through them.  That if we pursued and it was not God’s will for our family that our children would let us know.  That three specific “doors of adoption” process would be closed if this were a NO.

Guess what???  Our kids were thrilled, I mean ALL kids were thrilled… even Gary!  Those three doors have been held open with God as the doorman.  Jon and I looked at each other and said, “We’re adopting Willy!” 

                                                                                                               

You can also check out our YouTube for Willy here: http://youtu.be/GSq2mxIRu_U

The Starfish

Yesterday, I was told about the story of the Starfish.  I had never heard that story before and of course, had tears streaming my face as I came to the end of this short, sweet story.  And if you have heard this story, I am sure you know where I am going with this...

While Gary was here over the Chinese New Year, one of the things we have to do during the hosting program is to get a vision and dental check.  Our sweet boy had horrible teeth due to malnourishment.  I mean really bad!  Thousands of dollars worth of dental surgery, and repair.  Making our 1 required dental exam into 4 several hour long appointments! (ALL DONATED by the dentist!!)

Because of all the dental work and the dentist needing us to translate (using google translate and ilingo) Jon and I took turns sitting by Gary's side while all the work was being done.  This allowed ample time to chat with the dentist.  Jon, who spent most of the time back there because it got a little gruesome, had some great talks with the dentist about work, what hosting was all about, our little knowledge about where Gary was from in China, mission work Jon is involved in, in Montana, and faith.  Jon learned about Dr.'s mission work for the under privilege children all around the world and the many things he does to help.  At one point in the conversation the dentist looked over at Jon and said, "you know, you can't save them all."  Jon looking at Gary, smiled back and said, "you're right, but we can save this one."  The dentist then gave Jon a big smile and got back to finishing Gary's teeth.

THE STARFISH POEM

Once upon a time there was a wise man

who used to go to the ocean

to do his writing.

He had a habit of walking

on the beach

before he began his work.

One day he was walking along

the shore.

As he looked down the beach,

he saw a human

figure moving like a dancer.

He smiled to himself to think

of someone who would

dance to the day.

So he began to walk faster

to catch up.

As he got closer, he saw

that it was a young man

and the young man wasn't dancing,

but instead he was reaching

down to the shore,

picking up something

and very gently throwing it

into the ocean.

As he got closer he called out,

"Good morning! What are you doing?"

The young man paused,

looked up and replied,

"Throwing starfish in the ocean."

"I guess I should have asked,

why are you throwing starfish in the ocean?"

"The sun is up and the tide is going out.

And if I don't throw them in they'll die."

"But, young man, don't you realize that

there are miles and miles of beach

and starfish all along it.

You can't possibly make a difference!"

The young man listened politely.

Then bent down, picked up another starfish

and threw it into the sea,

past the breaking waves and said-

"It made a difference for that one."

All this pain...how is there joy?

“All this pain, I wonder if I’ll ever find my way, I wonder if my life could really change, at all?”-  These words from Gunger’s song “Beautiful things”, run through our heads and hearts at one time or another in our life…. Or maybe on a daily bases.  Am I ever going to find my way?  Can my life change, at all?  Can all the pain, and hurt and unfairness that seems to just find it’s way upon me EVER change??

As I ponder these thoughts and the answer to these questions I cannot help but let my mind wonder to our Gary.  The feeling of being unwanted, the heart breaking story of his loss and abandonment by his parents, the hurt in being turned over to a welfare institute… And my heart aches to the thought of his grandparents. His grandparents, who love him dearly… Who do not have the means to even provide the most simplest of necessities to survive. But out of pure love and desire for their grandson signed him over with the hope that one day, one day before his 14^th birthday, he would be found… He would be wanted… he would be loved… he would be adopted…he would be a part of a forever family!

On Christmas day 2012, our family decided to follow a command and a calling at our hearts.  We decided to host Gary…On February 2, 2013 as we saw Gary walking down the airport hall (we were in love, head over heels) He and Aaron embraced in the most amazing moments I have ever seen in my life.  At that moment of that simple hug, a hug, his life was changing and so was ours.  We tried so hard to not make any fast or hasty emotional decisions about adoption, and boy was that SO difficult!  But we were diligent in prayer and when I mean diligent I mean every waking moment an every breath breathed while Gary was here and even more before he arrived!  But on March 8, 2013 our son left for China.  He was leaving home and will be back again. He HAS been found, HE IS wanted, HE IS loved, HE IS being adopted before his 14^th birthday, and HE IS a part of a forever family!!
Oh, but it gets better…Gary not only is becoming a part of a forever family but 2 weeks after he was here, in America he surrendered his life to Christ and became a part of the forever family of God.

*On Wednesday, April 11, my mother and I drove to Mount Ulla, NC for her uncle’s funeral.   As I sat back and listened to this pastor of this small church, build in 1804, in a town of North Carolina that has not changed since 1804…. I was struck by the joy that was in this place.  I am not kidding, at a funeral, there was joy.  The pastor’s message was all of 10 minutes per my great uncle’s request and the pastor said zero about my great uncle…per his request but all about Christ. And that was just it…. The pastor speaking all about Christ spoke Loud and Clear all about my mom’s uncle!  Do you get that?  Oh, how I want my life to be lived in a way that all that is heard is Christ! 

Philippians 2:17 -“But I will rejoice even if I lose my life, pouring it out like a liquid offering to God, just like your faithful service is an offering to God. And I want all of you to share that joy.”

Here is one of the most wonderful verses in the Word of God.  It pictures what the Christian life should look like.  Paul is referring to one of the earliest offerings in the Old Testament. 
The Drink offering/ Liquid offering- Genesis 35:14

“The nesekh represented the devotion of the fruits of man's work to G-d, because it was not a natural product, but something created through man's effort. A representative piece of the offering was burnt on the fire of the altar.” –Judaism 101 

NESEKH Original Word: נָסַך Part of Speech: Verb Transliteration: nacak Phonetic Spelling: (naw-sak') Short Definition: cover I. נָסַךְ verb pour out

Why would this be significant to a Jewish believer/ Christian?

In the books Leviticus and Numbers the sacrifices are described.  WE learn that there was a drink offering and the meal offering.  It was never added to the sin offering or the trespass offering. It was a most unusual offering in that it had nothing to do with redemption; it had nothing to do with the person of Christ.  They would bring a skin of wine and just pour it on the sacrifice which was being consumed by fire.
What would happen to it????  
It would go up in steam and disappear!!!

Hummmmm…Paul is saying, “I want my life to be poured out like a drink offering on the offering of Christ!” Paul knows that the Lord Jesus Christ made the supreme sacrifice. He wanted his life to be a drink offering-just poured out o go up in steam. He wanted to be so consumed and obscured that all that is seen is just Jesus Christ. He wanted Christ to receive all the honor and the glory. This was the mind of Paul. This needs to be the mind of us.

Three wicks...

Tonight Jon and I were enjoying a nice evening by the fire,coffees in hand, gluten free cookies baking in the oven, and conversing… We love these quiet moments in the house when we can sit and chat and reminisce.  I was lighting a candle that is in a jar and has three wicks.  I was using another,smaller, single candle to light it.  (We were out of all other typical “lighting utensil.”) I had lit the single candle with the flame from our gas stove, took the single candle to the bigger candle with the three wicks to light it.  It is pretty tricky because the candle with three wicks is in a glass jar that has melted almost down to the bottom.  Turning the jar upside down I can light the wicks with the single candle…. Is this making any sense??  Anyway… it works but you have to do it fast or else all the hot wax starts to drip down your hand… and the flames get too big, and well, starts to hurt…

I did this sweet trick of lighting the candle while Gary was here. I was struggling to light the last wick and my hand was getting quite hot and the little hairs on my hand were starting to singe. (I am too suborned to give up on the last wick!)  Gary watching this entire time... Watching my whole system of lighting this candle…  Stove on, single candle lit, stove off, turn “jar candle” that is melted down to the bottom of the jar upside down, reach my hand in the with single candle, and light each wick…1…2…3, except I could not get that stupid last one lit and I was burning my hand, ugh.  Without a single word our sweet boy reached his precious, fragile, skinny, but brave hand between mine and the flames so I could light the candle. Did you read that?? He put his hand between the flames and my hand!! Our son cared more about keeping my hand safe than his own.

What a picture of what Christ did for us!  The act of Christ said, “If you do this, you will get hurt, actually, you will die. So, I will take the pain, the hurt, the suffering, and I will die, so that you will be safe and serve the purpose the Father has for your life.  My death, will shield you, so that you may live.”

“If when I am able to discover something which has baffled other, I forget Him who revealeth the deep and secret things, and knoweth what is in the darkness and showeth it to us; if I forget that it was He who granted that ray of light to His most unworthy servant, then I know nothing of Calvary love.”  -Amy Carmichael

www.bringgaryhome.weebly.com

FULLY PROVIDED...

“And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.” -Philippians 4:19

Sometimes when you “let go and let God”…. You don’t really expect Him to do anything so you still hang on…

Well today was a day that God really showed me what happens when you really do “let go.”

Yesterday, Jon and I were talking about the cost of adoption and how “we” were going/needing to raise money… Jon stopped and reminded me of George Mueller.

[Through all this, Müller never made requests for financial support, nor did he go into debt, even though the five homes cost over £100,000 to build. Many times, he received unsolicited food donations only hours before they were needed to feed the children, further strengthening his faith in God. For example, on one well-documented occasion, they gave thanks for breakfast when all the children were sitting at the table, even though there was nothing to eat in the house. As they finished praying, the baker knocked on the door with sufficient fresh bread to feed everyone, and the milkman gave them plenty of fresh milk because his cart broke down in front of the orphanage.]

We stopped and prayed.  We prayed and thanked God for providing for Gary’s adoption…Though we did not know how or when, we thank the Lord for taking care of this financial need.

“Faith does not operate in the realm of the possible.  There is no glory for God in that which is humanly possible. Faith begins where man’s power ends.”- George Mueller

Less than twenty four hours had passed and God made His provision known.  What was His provision?? God provided the full amount of the cost of the adoption!! He is leaving no room for doubt … No room for Jon or I to take any credit for “raising” funds… No credit for bringing Gary home on our own accord.  This is GOD providing!   He has been in this from the beginning and we can take NO credit for any of it!  God’s will is being work out through our lives, our family, and ALL who have been used by the hand of the Lord to help bring Gary home.

“I’m just trying to do what God tells me to do with His stuff. He did it, not me.”

Our Father's Love...

So today is March 15^th.  It has been a full week since our boy left to go back to China for a temporary time, waiting till our adoption process is finished here in the states.  It has been very difficult being very far from our boy, who we only met for the first time February 2, 2013… We love him so very much.

I have to admit how in awe I am over this whole thing… How much I love, our Gary.  How in my heart he is my very own son.  I don’t know how to explain this bond that happened.  Don’t know how to comprehend the connection of this maternal love that was instantaneous… even before he arrived on U.S. soil. 

Thinking about this only brings me to the conclusion that through this we get a glimpse of the love God our Father has for us.  That, He loved us first even before we “knew” Him...  This is the picture that comes to mind when I think about Gary.  We were orphaned in this world and God our Father gave us a way to him through His son, Jesus Christ.  That is our journey back “Home” to our Father.  Back in His arms, back in relationship with Him.

This journey of bringing Gary home, back to a relationship with us, his family… and the love that is so strong  and the connection we have can only be explained by the Love of our Father.  It is by His example that we follow.  It is by our Father’s love within us that allows us this connection, this bond, this parental love that we have for Gary. www.bringgaryhome.weebly.com